After landing the perfect job, you can only hope and pray that you work with people that you can really “work” with. People who make you better, encourage you, support you, share the same passion as you, and make you want to come to work each day. In any profession, working well with your colleagues and building relationships is important in how you feel, how you collaborate, and what makes you successful in what you do. Think about it, if you spend 40+ hours a week just at your job alone, don’t you want to spend it with people who you can actually work well with? Your teacher besties are the ones that help you get through it all and it’s an important support system to have. But if you find that you are dreading the workday because of colleagues you are just not connecting with and are not on the same page, it’s time to break up. You may have to use the cliché one-liner, “It’s not you, it’s me,” and pack your bags.
You’re Invisible
No matter what you say, what you do, or how high you are jumping up and down with great ideas, you are invisible. Or how about the colleague who sees it and hears it but takes credit for your ideas. Uh-huh, yea…I bet you have worked with a few of those people. Perhaps you’ve worked with colleagues that don’t like others coming up with the “great” ideas before they are the first ones to shout them out. Sometimes it’s a challenge working with people like that. We all need some kind of acknowledgment to feel comfortable in the workplace. If you’re not feeling like your contributions and ideas are being recognized, it may be time for a break-up.
You’re Being Taken Advantage Of
Maybe you are the one that is often thoughtful and too nice. You are doing all the things, like bringing in coffee, making extra copies, taking care of sub plans when teachers are out. I’m all for being nice and thoughtful but when there is little to no appreciation that leads to colleagues thinking, “Hey she/he got this, she’ll do it.” Can you please run these copies for me while you are at the copier?” “Would you mind taking my recess duty today because I have a headache?” If this is happening, you are putting out more than you are getting in return and will be taken advantage of. And don’t be afraid to speak up. Give a friendly reminder to your colleagues that you are always willing to help out, but not to the point where you will be taken advantage of. If it doesn’t improve, it’s time for a change.
You Are Not Growing
How many professional development opportunities were offered to you compared to your colleagues? Are you learning and growing from your peers? Are they impacting your career in a positive way? These are questions you should be thinking about. If you find that you are at a workplace for 10 years or more and haven’t made gains in PD, been offered different roles or leadership opportunities, you may want to find a workplace where you can grow and learn. I made the mistake of staying in the same place for too long. I was in a place where I wasn’t being developed in the way that I hoped or recognized for my skills and contributions. I realized that if I stay in the same place and become stagnant I will not continue to grow as a professional. I most certainly do not want to be the same person I am 30 years from now. I want to continue to learn, grow and teach others. So that may mean I will not retire in the place I am in today and I may have to take some risks to get to the place I am meant to be. Change is good…embrace it!
Your Colleagues Are Draining You
If you find that you are in a work environment that is full of negativity and your colleagues are “Debbie Downers and “Negative Nellies,” this may be lighting the fuel of the tired teacher inside you. These colleagues will drain you. They will make you run for the hills when you see one coming down the hall or call your name from behind. The Debbie Downers are those who complain about anything and everything. We all know as educators that there are a lot of flaws in the education system, many of which are out of our control. So when we are surrounded by Debbie Downers, the negativity is toxic and is contagious. The Negative Nellies are their biggest fans and will chime right in, spewing their negativity out like a can of silly string. Steer clear and put your hands over your ears and run. Don’t let them get to you too. And then there are the Chatty Cathy’s. The ones that NEVER stop talking and veer off topic any chance they could get, whether it is in a meeting, during a professional development workshop, in the hallway, or even in the elevator. When you get cornered by a Chatty Cathy you will never get a word in and will not get any of your work done. They are time eaters. There were times that I stayed an extra 45 minutes to an hour after school cornered by a Chatty Cathy which was a complete waste of my time. All of these types of colleagues are draining. Say adios!
So a break up may be just what you need. It may be time for a change. A change in grades, in schools, or districts. I know some teachers who were considering leaving the teaching profession altogether, but made a change in colleagues instead and were much happier. It’s the people we surround ourselves with that make us happy and successful. Don’t be afraid to go and find them.
Don’t have a teacher bestie? There are also many Facebook groups for teachers that are extremely supportive and welcoming. It’s nice to collaborate with educators across the world.
Have you broken up with your colleagues or think it may be time to? Share in the comments.
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Christine Weis is a passionate educator, classroom management coach, wife, and mom of two busy boys. She enjoys teaching, writing, and creating resources for teachers.
I am currently going thru all of those things right now. It is causing alot of stress for me right but I live in a small town and there is little opportunity for me. I hope I can find another job soon.
Oh no! We all go through this it some point in our career. Something will come your way and I hope it comes soon. Keep looking, stay positive and don’t give up!!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
Actually, I don’t really care about what others may say or think of me. But it doesn’t mean I don’t give a damn about others too. I just continue to be positive to other people, and be with positive people too. Sometimes, you just have to shut your ears off to not hear any negativity around you and focus only on the good vibes.
Surrounding yourself with positivity is key to happiness and success. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
I work from home. But I will definitely keep this in mind if that ever changes. haha!!
Working from home does has its benefits. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
It is important for people who work together to work as a team and lift each other up. Instead most work for their own personal goals which is unfortunate.
– http://www.allshethings.com
Yes…I completely agree! I never looked at anyone else’s success as a threat or only worked toward bettering myself. It’s all about working and growing together! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
It’s unfortunate that colleagues don’t support each other. If more people were supportive, people would be better off
True! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
I work from home so I don’t have to deal with people often 😂 But I definitely have had coworkers in the past that were rough to work with !
Ha! That could be a good thing! Sometimes it’s great working just for yourself or by yourself. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
It is sad that these things happen. When I was working my first corporate job, I could not make others listen to my suggestions. They viewed me as a threat to their positions. The best decision I ever made was to quit. The environment was just too toxic for me to handle. For my many years working in the corporate jungle I learned one important lesson – “People do not quit because of the company. They quit because of management.”
That is so sad when others view knowledgeable and passionate people as threats. A toxic environment like that is best to get out of. Sounds like you made the right choice. And I agree about why people quit. People are more apt to stay with the company when they have a good relationship with their boss or colleagues, even if they don’t like the job so much. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
these reasons are great. its so important to realize when it is time to let go and move forward.
Thank you! Exactly! It’s okay to let go and move forward! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
This is a great post. I used to work with people that made it that bad I started to hate the job and left.
Thank you! Not good when that happens! It is important to work well with your colleagues. It makes your work day so much better and so much more productive. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
Making friends at work can make you job even better or it can hurt it. I’ve had both experience.
That is so true!! I bet many of us have had both experiences. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
I’ve been lucky in recent years that I’ve worked with people I like. But it is such a downer when you dread seeing your colleagues. Good advice on how to get through it.
Thank you! I’m glad to hear that you like the people you work with. That’s so important! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
I’ve always loved all of my work colleagues. That’s usually the only reason I want to stay in a job! Not the job itself 🤣
That is SO good to hear! It makes a world of a difference! I’m glad! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
This is important to be mindful of while at work, especially if they are taking advantage or making you feel invisible.
Yes…it’s important to be mindful at work, especially with your colleagues and how you work together. Good point! Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
You got some great key points! I think that colleagues come and go in our lives and it’s important to follow our intuition.
Thank you! Absolutely…when your gut tells you that it’s time to break up with our colleagues or leave the workplace..I’d trust my intuition. You know what’s best for yourself. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
This advice is probably true for many different fields. It really is sound advice. Thanks for posting.
Yes…definitely true for all professions. It’s so important to feel comfortable and appreciated wherever you work. Thanks for reading!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers
One of my teacher besties suffered through all of these scenarios at the school that she previously taught at for 15+ years. It’s unfortunate that not only do teachers have a difficult job, we sometimes have colleagues that make even the best parts unbearable.
It takes a LOT of courage to leave a site because you don’t know what you’re going to walk into next. However, if staying is stifling professional growth and leading to negativity and apathy, then I agree that it’s time to go!
Thanks as always for sharing!
I’m so sorry to hear that your teacher bestie suffered through all of these scenarios and she was there a really long time. Sometimes it’s the place you stay at the longest to try to tough it out, ends up being the worst place to stay. I’m so glad she finally got out. It does take courage but if she didn’t leave she wouldn’t have met you…her new teacher bestie!!! She’s pretty lucky!!!Thanks for reading Kim!
Christine at For The Love of Teachers